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THE NUMBER OF people in this country with dementia is expected to more than treble over the next 30 years. Yet a tenth of the funding that goes into cancer research goes into dementia research, as if the death of the mind is somehow deemed less significant than that of the body. A sudden, decisive end somehow deemed more worthy of tackling than a gradual, insidious decline where the individual is slowly hollowed from the inside out.
Dementia is more than just ‘getting a bit doddery’. It is more than just forgetting where the keys were left or the name of a grandchild. It is leaving the grill on and not understanding what the smoke alarm means. Or drinking half a bottle of whiskey because you didn’t recall when you had the first glass. And then getting behind the wheel.
It is relying upon the kindness of strangers and walking blindly into the arms of anyone who chooses to take advantage. It is hoping that the world around you will choose to protect, not just ignore. It is the body of an adult with the innocence of a child. It is vulnerability personified.
It is clinging to the remnants of a personality which haven’t yet been obliterated by an insidious and silent disease which creeps up and takes hold without fanfare or scans, without treatment options or operating theatres. Without any real warning that something is terribly wrong. Until it is.
It is listening to professionals volunteer that this is ‘the worse stage’. As if it will somehow be easier to handle when the person no longer knows their own name. It is being told solemnly that they have a strong heart. With ‘unfortunately’ being the unspoken addition. Because the rate of decline of their mind is in no way matched by that of their body, and it will depart them long before their physical presence follows suit. It is grieving that loss as they stand right in front of you. And hiding it.
It is being instructed that it is a ‘long road’ ahead and to pace yourself. And yet never once being asked how it feels to be their companion on this inevitable road to nowhere.
It is managing a condition where even after it is afforded a name, it is unclear which medic needs to address it. As oblivious patient is vollied between geriatricians (implying dementia is a natural part of aging) and psychiatrists (implying that it is not).
It is the ups and the downs, the good days and bad. The degenerative milestones you would rather not notice, and the ordinary chat as if nothing were a miss. It is trying to be the best daughter you can be, and parenting in reverse, when there isn’t even a verb to describe the uncomfortable dynamic that entails. An inevitable role reversal which neither generation welcomes.
It is the knowing looks you get from sympathetic strangers who have walked a mile in your shoes and who understand the unnatural dynamic it entails. Who too have fallen down the rabbit hole and woken up in a topsy, turvy world where parent is child and vice versa.
It is being forced to question what constitutes quality of life. Whether exposure to every day risks is intrinsic to life itself, and whether shielding from all those risks equates to no life at all. Just like the odd bruise and scuffed knee on our children signifies their living their little lives to the full, can an adult who is entirely protected from the outside world really be said to live at all?
It is trying to fast forward the clock 40 years, and putting yourself in their shoes. Or rewinding it ten to put yourself back in theirs and decipher their wishes. It is crystal ball stuff and it is difficult beyond words. There are no rights and no wrongs. Just 50 distressing shades of grey. Which most people generally don’t like to discuss, because they don’t understand it. Cancer, they get. Alzheimer’s, they can’t even spell.
Most medical professionals in this country have not had sufficient training in handling people with dementia even though it is estimated that a quarter of all patients in a general hospital setting at any one time will suffer from it. And if the medics can’t get around to learning about it, you can only imagine how it is handled by the professionals within our banks, our utilities, our legal system, our large corporate entities. All of which deal, directly or indirectly, with dementia sufferers all the time, but for whom ‘corporate social responsibility’ does not extend to training their staff on how to humanely deal with the most vulnerable and deserving members of our society.
However you choose to define it, be that in statistics or in human experience, this is the future that awaits us. This is the legacy that we are blindly passing on to our own children.
Pension crisis? Global warming? That will pale into insignificance if one in five of us can’t tell the difference between a fiver and a tenner, and whether it’s 2 degrees outside or 20. And yet the long awaited National Dementia Strategy promised within the 2011 Programme for Government is still awaited.
Ireland is predicted to have the largest growth in older population in Europe in the coming decades. Risk factors for dementia include booze (“Anyone for another?”), high cholesterol and obesity (“Giv’s a side of chips with that Mary love, would ya?’’), mental illness (“Ah, sure you’ll be grand”), and of course old age (see above). Yet Ireland spends roughly half the OECD average on investment in long-term care. Worried yet? We should be.
Me? I just pray I never have to hear those immortal words. That I am not one of the 147,000 sufferers predicted in this country by 2041. For the sake of all concerned, give me a heart attack any day over being betrayed by my own mind.
The author has direct experience of caring for a loved one with dementia. Out of respect for them, she would rather remain anonymous. The Alzheimer’s Tea Day takes place on 1st May. Please support those working to improve the lives of those suffering from this ever increasing disease.
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Well done Charlie. Another boost for economic migrants,welfare tourists etc. We are a great little country
@Leo Lalor: most Irish citazens returning home to live here with their foreign wives/husband’s are actually highly skilled. Also the government for once is sorting out immigration paths for those impacted by brexit. Absolutely it will need to be policed properly but it’s making the immigration policy fairer.
@Leo Lalor: you seem to have missed the part where these ‘migrants’ will be working and paying tax. We have an extreme skills shortage in many sectors in Ireland. By your logic all Irish people should only partner with their own kind and if not feck off to their partners country to work. Would that make the Irish person an economic migrant and welfare tourist then? oh it’s so confusing when you put the shoe on the other foot. Oh I get it now there is no logic just prejudice.
@seanmccann: Exactly and having to go through a similar process myself there are plenty of checks carried out for both the applicant and their spouse. It’s not the “one for everybody in the audience” type of thing that some people believe it to be.
@Leo Lalor: The Irish partner will have to show evidence that they can financially support the non eu partner. Over the last 10 years, they were pretty strict on this
@seanmccann: ” Also the government for once is sorting out immigration paths for those impacted by brexit. ”
Brexit has nothing to do with it really.
If an Irish citizen was over in the UK, they are exercising their EU Treaty Rights. While we can not normally use EU Free movement rights while in Ireland (and thus have to rely on Irish immigration law, which has its issues) , in this case, where the Irish person returns to Ireland, after spending 1-2 years in the UK (6 months might suffice), with their non EU partner/spouse, they can invoke EU law.
Why does that matter? Better protections. EU law give the Irish government SFA discretion. You meet the conditions, boom, you get a decision which should be successful and entitled to a quick decision (well, that is what EU says) . Relying on Irish law, a lot of discretion is afforded.
@Leo Lalor: Leo, I’d be grateful if you could share with us how to take advantage of the welfare system without first working, paying tax, paying PRSI etc. You seem to be in the know. Even free dental work would be sufficient. Thanks
@Christy Dolan: look at what Boris is doing with residencey rights in the UK. Many Irish citazens are going to choose to leave as their residencey is no longer gauerenteed. Join the dots.
@LittleBee: and so many on the take little bee. As for logic I never mentioned stick with your own. Open your eyes. Look at the social welfare immigration lawyers bills and housing and accommodation bills for these spongers. I have no problem with people who contribute to our economy. I have a problem with being hammered by the tax man to pay for people who won’t work and no matter what s done for them find fault. We are fools.
@Leo Lalor: totally missing the point again. This is referring to the partners of Irish people who want to return home to work and is specifically so the non EU partner can work as soon as they get here where previously they had to be supported by their Irish partner for up to a year. They cannot claim any benefits as they are non eu in fact they cannot even be considered as a dependent of the Irish individual if they were to claim benefits because our system only considers the income of a de facto partner for means testing but not for the payment of benefits. You know what else is a drain on society …tax evasion and high earners with hot shot accountants finding all the loop holes. But like your arguement that has diddly squat to do with the actual topic in the article.
That’s absolutely brilliant news, if it turns out to be as good as it sounds. At present the most suitable place for me and my Brazilian partner is Australia. We both have PR and enjoy our time here however while I respect the rules etc and understand the need for checks and balances, the thought of coming home to apply and being the sole earner for one year was taking the piss. It was a big off putter on me deciding to come home. This is a big change. Most welcome. I’m sure there’s plenty of us out there who welcome the efficiency.
Why does our government feel the need to have such an open door policy toward immigration?
@Pat Baker: because sometimes people who aren’t from the same country fall in love and get married and they should be allowed to live in the same country as each other. Should we all just never leave the country and never let anyone in and only let Irish people marry other Irish people?
@Sam Harms: Absolutely agree. But it needs to be policed properly to prevent abuse. In many industries worker are internationally mobile. If Irish citizens want to come back home then they and their families should be welcome. I was in a generation where many had to leave to find opportunities to work. Most of these people learned valuable skills and their return to the country enabled the high tech economy. Having seen the hoops they had to jump through to get visas for their spouses was rediclous. It was practically anti family. Also this legislation is coming in as a result of brexit.
@Pat Baker: Its not an open door policy it’s called preclearence. The procedure is the same but the checks are done before you enter the country meaning you have permission to work before you get here or even have a job lined up. It is simply removing the financial burden of waiting a year to get your working visa. It means partners of returning Irish can work and pay tax as soon as they get here. Why would you be opposed to that.
@Sam Harms: ignore him.
@Pat Baker: It’s a sensible policy for realistic scenarios and it’s not the open door policy that you’re making it out to be. There’s plenty of information that would need to be provided for the application to be successful such as proof of a relationship, proof of living together…
@LittleBee: he’s opposed to it because some people see the word “immigration” and the racist, intolerant, bigot switch turns on. They can’t see past that to look at the positive impact that immigrants have on a country, like bringing new skills, paying into the tax system etc.
@Sam Harms: It is so tiresome
@Pat Baker: It is NOT an open door policy. There is pre clearance required. You have to prove the relationship and you have to prove financial ability to support partner.
Before this, you had to apply for a visa for the Non EU spouse (who might need to visa) simply to enter the country. That can take 2-4 months, maybe more. Sometimes you need to appeal.
Once they enter, they then have to make a residency application, which can take anything from 1 week to months.
This scheme seeks to do all in one go, before they come, before they risk over staying after the visa expired.
They still need to prove that they are a legitimate relationship. It is an Irish person bringing home their family member. Hardly the same as some scam artist “asylum seeker” from a safe country .
@Pat Baker: I’m not aware of the government having an open door policy towards immigration, but one reason I can think of, is the various benefits that immigration brings to the country.
In many cases immigrants are already highly educated and highly skilled, as as such help contribute to our skills shortage. Also being highly skilled, and thus highly paid, they’ll also be highly taxed…
@Pat Baker: you mean like the ones that absorbed millions of Irish emigrants over the centuries?
I’ve experience with INIS and there’s no grey area if your papers are not in order forget about a visa.
@Marianne:Has Regina decided whether they need the PSC to apply for the passport?
Anything possible of diluting the anti fg voters who are a rock of sense and are sick of the waste of tax payers money and multiple scandals
Great news. This would have been a not insignificant deterrent to Irish expats who wanted to return home.
Great news. Lot of Irish groups abroad have worked hard for this to be considered. Lot of us Irish have great partners from around the world we met while working abroad, who are highly educated and see Ireland as a good option to raise a family at some stage. No doubt so many can contribute greatly to our communities. This removes some doubts about any move home. Having had my Canadian girlfriend visit home recently who comes from an immigrant family herself she got the greatest welcome from my closest family and friends I could have asked for. Sometimes I forgot how great people at home are. Bigots really are a minority and tend to act as keyboard warriors unfortunately I have to see here online. Some people just have no comprehension of change being positive
Very sensible move by the Government here. Will definitely help reduce the financial stress upon a couple moving back to Ireland where one of the couple is not an EU citizen.
Who makes these decisions
How long will this process take
@Marianne: you’d just have to meet the criteria and provide evidence if I understand correctly
The Irish partner has to be a CSEP holder, not just any one bringing their non EU partner home can apply. Very misleading article
@Caoimhín O Neill: My understanding of that link is that the csep holder is not Irish either and wants to bring their partner. Same as the Australian visa system.
What the journal is referring to is de facto partners of Irish citizens, who, as they are Irish, do not need any special status such as csep or visa to work here. Why would we only want Irish citizens to return if they held a csep?
@Caoimhín O Neill: the CSEP announcement is from April. This is separate by the looks: http://www.inis.gov.ie/en/INIS/Pages/press-release-new-preclearance-process-to-be-introduced-to-help-non-eea-de-facto-partners-of-Irish
What about refugees from Brexit land?
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