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Opinion Don't let your fear of flying ruin your holiday – follow these tips

You deserve those stress-free days on a sun-kissed beach: don’t let an irrational fear get in the way.

THE HOLIDAY SEASON is well under way and for most people who travel abroad that means lazy days spent on sun-kissed beaches with the stress of working life relegated to a distant memory. However, for some of the 2.1 million people estimated by the travel industry to have passed through Dublin Airport last month, getting to their holiday experience can be a traumatic experience because they have an irrational fear of flying.

In some extreme cases, passengers are too terrified to even travel to the airport.

In seeking to overcome this phobia, it is important for nervous passengers to establish why their fear of flying began and what triggered it. It may be an irrational fear or it could be due to a negative experience that they had on a previous flight. Encountering turbulence, which is a naturally occurring phenomenon, can often cause fear among passengers.

Once they have identified the reason for their fear, it is important that they inform themselves about flying to help them overcome it.

Understanding what happens on a plane

The most relevant fact that people travelling on holiday should be aware of is that flying is by far the safest mode of transport. Compared to driving, there are a minuscule number of accidents and safety is the industry’s paramount issue.

It is also beneficial for a fearful flyer to understand what actually happens when an aircraft is in operation, as this will explain the myriad of sounds and noises one hears during a flight.

To further debunk the irrational concerns some people have about flying, it is advisable that nervous passengers visit an airport on a day when they are not travelling to get accustomed to the environment.

This would allow them to experience the sights and sounds without feeling the stress or anticipation of having to fly. It would also allow them the opportunity to observe planes taking off and landing.

If you are nervous about flying, it is also important to realise that you are not alone – countless other passengers experience the same feelings before and during flights.

Ask for assistance 

To cater for this demographic, commercial airlines have developed an expertise in soothing frazzled nerves. Therefore, it is advisable that you tell the cabin crew about your concerns as soon as you board.

An airplane’s crew members are used to making nervous customers feel more comfortable during the flight. They will be able to tell passengers about the flight’s progress, the route the plane is taking and what the weather conditions are like, all of which will provide reassurance. If there is something that makes you nervous during the flight – an unexplained noise or a shift in the plane’s direction for instance – they can explain what is happening and reassure you.

While some people prefer to use medication or alcohol to conquer their fear of flying, it is far more beneficial for passengers to get a good night’s sleep before travelling and to eat well before they board the flight.

It is also beneficial for nervous travellers to arrive at the airport early. After all, if a passenger is already nervous, rushing through the check in process and then racing through security and on to the gate is only going to add to their concerns.

Avoid short-term ‘fixes’ like alcohol

If you have got this far, then the next steps are less complicated. Once you are en route, make sure to drink plenty of water and avoid alcohol – it may temporarily numb your fear, but you will dehydrate far quicker at 40,000 feet. Instead, move around the plane once the seatbelt sign is off.

This helps to normalise the situation and if you engage in conversation with the crew or other holidaymakers, it’ll provide a welcome distraction.

Make sure as well to control your breathing, taking deep breaths. This will make you much more relaxed and is a far more effective way to deal with your fears than feverishly grasping the arm rest, which will only serve to accentuate stress levels.

A combination of these methods will help most passengers to overcome their concerns. However, there is also a group of travellers with an extreme, irrational fear, who won’t even go near an airport. They would benefit greatly from taking part in a course designed for fearful flyers or to see a therapist who specialises in flying phobias.
No matter how scared you are, remember that you are not alone.

Dos & Don’ts For Nervous Flyers

Do: Remember that flying is the safest form of transport

Do: Visit an airport when you are not flying

Do: Make your concerns know to cabin crew

Do: Arrive early at the airport to avoid stress

Do: Drink loads of water and eat well

Do: Take deep breaths to relax

Do: Consider taking a course to overcome your fears

Don’t: Keep your fears to yourself

Don’t: Stay up all night worrying about the flight

Don’t: Arrive at the airport with only a few minutes to spare

Don’t: Drink alcohol before or during a flight

Don’t: Grip your arm rest

Don’t: Stay in your seat for the duration of the flight

Don’t: Let your fear of flying ruin your holiday

Shane Kelly is Professional Services Manager with the Irish Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy.

Column: ‘Fear of flying won’t stop me – I am getting on that flight’

Column: ‘I never thought I’d get on a plane alone’

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    Mute Cosmo Kramer
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:18 PM

    It’s not a fear of flying people have.. It’s a fear of falling from 40000 feet in an uncontrollable spin, knowing for those few terrifying minutes that you were right all along about that flying lark..

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    Mute Getyercoat
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    Jul 12th 2014, 2:31 PM

    It’s a fear of not being in control. Powerful fear but that’s what it boils down to.

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    Mute Shane Hickey
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:10 PM

    I’m obsessed with aircraft and flight but I’m the worst nervous flyer you will ever encounter.

    These tips don’t work for me Shane, sorry. I’ve tried them all

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    Mute Joe_King
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:11 PM

    Just have a few drinks and you’ll be grand

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    Mute William Grogan
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:33 PM

    “Fear of flying” is a misnomer. What happens is that flying, and for some even any travelling, induces stress. So it should be called Stress Caused by Flying.

    Once you realise that then minimise your stress. Some points above are good but try, taking a very deep breath, hold it in for 10 seconds, let it out slowly and repeat a few times. That reduces stress.

    Avoid flying with a hangover. Sit absolutely as close to the front as you can, less movement in the plane at the front. Worst in the very back seats particularly in Airbuses. Do a course from an airline. I almost never flew for 10 years now I fly an average of 40 times per year. And I’ve been on a few hairy flights.

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    Mute David Ronan
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:36 PM

    Same as myself Shane, I think the fact that I know so much about them only heightens my (admittedly unreasonable) fear.

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    Mute mcgoo
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:42 PM

    Sitting in the back is a lot safer though. It’s very rare that you’ll see a plane reversing into a mountain.

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    Mute AJ McLaughlin
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:43 PM

    @William

    “Sit absolutely as close to the front as you can, less movement in the plane at the front”

    No true, the middle of an aeroplane has the least movement, normally just forward of the wings. Think of a see-saw.

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    Mute William Grogan
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:52 PM

    AJ I’m no aviation expert but a pilot explained to me that planes fly as if pivoted on the nose. I was once in the cockpit of a 747 half way to the US and you could have played pool if there was a pool table it was that quiet and steady. Think of the wings flexing up and down. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ca4PgyBJAzM

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    Mute Patrice Lelookcoco
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:08 PM

    True but based on the chances that the pilot will trying to save his own neck, I prefer to sit as close to him as possible!

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    Mute Tom Toms
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    Jul 11th 2014, 4:01 PM

    Lets call a spade a spade here : At the end of the day you have an aluminium tube that’s as thin as a credit card in parts, you cram it full of many many people, fill it with materials that when they burn they create toxic gases and then effectively wrap that tube in highly combustible kerosene and hurl it down a runway at 150MPH. That’s scary s***

    HOWEVER

    it still is the safest form of travel and you are more likely to be killed by lightening as there are more deaths from lightening strikes globally per annum than Plane crashes. Also..if you crash there is a huge chance you will survive. 90% of the very small number of plane crashes have survivors. I think of it like this…think of Dublin airport and all the flights that have come in and out of there every day for as long as you can remember and none (as far as I know) have crashed. I had a chronic fear of dying in a place crash (not flying) and I found watching air crash investigation made me more confident to fly, while they do go through each crash, they tell you how each crash has created significant improvements to the safety of flying. Now sit back, relax and enjoy that manky bacon butty and scalding tea. You’ll get there and back!

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    Mute Eugene Glancy
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    Jul 11th 2014, 4:51 PM

    That’s class!!

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    Mute William Grogan
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    Jul 11th 2014, 5:09 PM

    I’m reminded of the Californians or Texans who drive across the border to buy Lotto tickets. Someone worked out they had a bigger chance of being killed in a car crash going for the ticket than winning the Lotto. People don’t get statistics or else the Lotto wouldn’t exist.

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    Mute ragnar daneskold
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    Jul 12th 2014, 12:57 AM

    If the plane looks like it will crash.Climb into the Black Box.That always survives the crash!!
    Sorry,pilots humour.

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    Mute Jack Dexter
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:07 PM

    I never had a fear of air travel until I started watching Air crash investigation on the TV.

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    Mute Winston Teardrops
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:45 PM

    That doesn’t help. Think though – how many episodes in the series? If they did a car version, hundreds of dedicated lifetimes woulnd’t allow you to watch the series. Think about that next time you sit ina car.

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    Mute Deirdre O'Byrne
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    Jul 11th 2014, 3:38 PM

    I’ve never been afraid of flying, and I have to say Air Crash Investigation actually increases my confidence in flying as a mode of transport. The investigations that are carried out after a crash are incredible in their detail and in what they are able to uncover. And when something is found to be wrong, the industry (usually) responds quite quickly.

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    Mute Dave Davis
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    Jul 11th 2014, 4:43 PM

    Have to agree. That show made me a thousand times more comfortable with flying.

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    Mute Andrew Haire
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    Jul 11th 2014, 9:11 PM

    One if my favourite programmes. Like CSI except it’s all facts. Still the safest way to travel. But if anything goes badly wrong ‘ YOU ARE ALL GONNA DIE ‘ ha, sorry.

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    Mute Ruairi mcdonald
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:26 PM

    Hearing things like ‘it’s the safest mode of transport’ etc etc makes no difference to those of us that are afraid of flying. Xanax all the way!!

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    Mute dearg doom
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:41 PM

    True, and it’s insulting to hear that those bytes of info like we’ve never heard them before.
    Xanax has hardly any effect on me. I tried it with alcohol to see if that would help any more but I was just petrified and woozy.

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    Mute Andrea Rock Massey
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    Jul 11th 2014, 4:27 PM

    I take a Xanax too, my doctor upped the dosage a few years ago when the milder ones stopped working. For long flights, it’s a Xanax and then a Zimovane to knock me out. Otherwise I’m not getting on the plane, simple as that!

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    Mute Ruairi mcdonald
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    Jul 11th 2014, 6:14 PM

    Ask your doc to up the dose to 500mg, it should help you out!

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    Mute Andrea Rock Massey
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    Jul 11th 2014, 6:47 PM

    I’m a long way from that point Ruairi, thank God! 10MG does the trick and I only need to take half so far. Mind you, it’s been a 5 years since I’ve flown anywhere so who knows how bad I’ll be by the time I get to holiday abroad again!

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    Mute 巴里永世
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:38 PM

    I’m not afraid of flying, I’m afraid of crashing.

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    Mute That New Guy
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:44 PM

    What’s more frightening is that someone supposedly in the industry of counselling doesn’t understand fear and makes a point of preceding each mention of it with “irrational” in a very transparent attempt to try and drive home a viewpoint.

    Fear: an unpleasant emotion caused by the THREAT of danger, pain, or harm. i.e. emotion caused by an assessment of the POTENTIAL for a major life threatening scenario.

    I hate when people use the “safest form of transport statistically” argument. Especially when they throw in the comparison to driving. Equally, backed by statistics, is that every day millions of car accidents happen but the number of resulting fatalities is but a fraction of a percent of those accidents {0.67% specifically if you take the US in 2003 as a base case http://www.car-accidents.com/pages/stats.html}.
    Taking the fatalities as a proportion of airplane accidents, you’ll find that number is much higher.

    The key to treating fear therefore is not to force yourself to become fearless, because fearless implies you are ignorant of risks entirely, but to understand and rationalise the probability of the risk materialising. Then when you talk in probability terms, flying becomes much more acceptable. Like the lotto, things do happen to people, but the likelihood it will be you is miniscule.

    I don’t have a fear of flying so I’m not speaking from experience, the tone of this guy’s “article” just annoyed me.

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    Mute Lola
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:29 PM

    Really enjoyed reading your comment, makes far more sense then above, puts it into better perspective!

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    Mute Shane
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:07 PM

    Sudoku or something that challenges the brain helps. Audio book called fear of flying helped me.

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    Mute Boganity
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:15 PM

    As the fella said to the Captain on a particularly bumpy flight: how often do these aircraft crash ? Only the once said the Captain.

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    Mute Seán A Haon
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:20 PM

    Na, alcohol all the way. I hate flying but when drunk it’s fantastic. Longer flights just go the doc for some pills. Done.

    You can’t take deep breaths for a 9hr flight to Florida but you can get drunk and enjoy it :)

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    Mute Donal O Neil
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:52 PM

    The big fear people have is trying to let go of there own control of there environment and handing this to 2 people in the front of the plane . A plane is a tube of metal with wings on and will dip up and down in flight and will shake with turbulence but this is all normal . Planes have been tested in multiples of this to get there certificate to fly and the pilots train for severe turbulence regularly so sit back read a book listen to music or chat with your fellow passengers .

    Safe flying everyone

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    Mute Deirdre O'Byrne
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    Jul 11th 2014, 3:55 PM

    When you get on a plane, broadly speaking one of two things is going to happen. Either you will get off the plane at your destination safe and sound, or you won’t.

    The unfortunate thing is that if this is the time for you to not get to your destination safely, there is probably nothing you can do about it. You are in a tin can travelling at high speed defying gravity, and when something goes wrong you are dependent on some professionals in the air and on the ground to figure it out and act accordingly. There is nothing you can do to help them. The good news is that two of the professionals are highly motivated to get the problem solved, as they are facing the same risk of death as you.

    So – what are you going to do? What I do is I do my best to enjoy the trip. If something goes wrong, I’ll brace, I’ll follow the instructions I’m given, I’ll use my wits. But there is utterly no point in me worrying about it unless and until it happens. No doubt it would be an utterly shitty experience, but it is also something I’m highly unlikely to ever face.

    What is far far more likely is that every now and then, I get to look out on the tops of clouds, I get to be reminded that the sky is still blue when all I can see from the ground are the bottom of clouds, I get to look down on and have a new perspective on human activity, I get to travel at high speeds to an exciting / warm / friendly / whatever place. And sometimes I even get to have a wonderful experience in the air when I happen to see something marvellous below or witness some beauty I cannot witness otherwise.

    Happy travels!

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    Mute dearg doom
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:50 PM

    I find getting to the airport early is worse, it feels like you’re just waiting to die. If you get there 1hr 30m before, there’s normally enough time to get through without thinking about the flight itself. It’s probably people who get stressed about the whole flying experience that would benefit from getting there early as opposed to people who are actually scared they’re going to die.

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    Mute Colm Flaherty
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:45 PM

    It’s the people scared to die who need *professional* help. Are you scared to drive? No? Well if you’re scared to die at the airport, you should be sh*tting a brick behind the wheel. Or, bring your driving attitude to the airport.

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    Mute Alan Farrell
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:09 PM

    There are more car accidents because there are a hell of a lot more cars on the road than there are planes in the sky at any one time.

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    Mute William Grogan
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:36 PM

    Alan, per mile travelled flying is the safest form of travel. It’s not relevant to the number of planes or cars. You’ve a better chance of being killed driving to the airport than being killed on the flight.

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    Mute Dee M
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:11 PM

    I tried several fear of flying courses, one with Virgin, one with Fly Fearless and one with Keith Barry and 98fm. I’ve tried tablets, alcohol, meditation and hypnotherapy and still nothing, I really wish I could fly but I think flying just isn’t for some people :/

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    Mute Capt Tom Bunn LCSW
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:20 PM

    Dee, you – unknowingly – have been victimized. Every course you have taken is inadequate. Medication backfires, according to research at the Stamford University School of Medicine. Meditation is relaxing on the ground where you are in a controlled secure environment; it is useless in the air where the plane is triggering the release of stress hormones when it drops or makes noises. Hypnotherapy is, at best, “hit or miss” and even then, does not produce lasting results.

    There is so much junk psychology out there victimizing the public, and making anxious fliers belief their case is hopeless, that I recently posted a blog on Psychology Today about the suffering well-meaning people cause. See http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/conquer-fear-flying/201405/how-anxious-flier-can-recognize-and-avoid-junk-psychology-8

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    Mute Seán A Haon
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:22 PM

    I was told the best way to get over a fear of flying is to jump out of a plane. With a parachute attached of course :)

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    Mute ragnar daneskold
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    Jul 12th 2014, 1:11 AM

    OR,go and learn how to fly one or take an aerobatic flight.Once you have been chucked about in a few loops ,Immelman turns,and falling leafs by a very experianced aerobatic pilot.There will be nothing in commerical airline flying that will scare you.
    My flight instructor was an EX RAF pilot who flew Tornadoes,and I asked him once would there be anything I could do to scare him as a student.His answer was,if you are used to flying in a dense pack formation of six planes 30 meters above ,beside,behind and in front of you down a Scottish glen in zero visibility in the middle of a Winters night on a bombing run at over 350 mph at almost zero feet and you are relying on ground radar,your instruments and hoping your fellow wingmen arent nodding off and creeping up or down on you,then No there is nothing that I or anyone in a commercial jet could do to scare him.Then he promptly scared the living daylights out of me by doing an hour of barrel rolls,loops,etc.Flying has never bothered me since.

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    Mute Frank
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:42 PM

    Things were a lot worse in the 1970′s when air crash statistics were much higher.

    At one time DC10′s were dropping out of the sky like flies.

    http://cdn.phys.org/newman/gfx/news/hires/2014/andtheawardf.jpg

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    Mute emma fitz
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:01 PM

    I hate flying. I’m going next week and already I’m freaking out. I cry like a baby the whole flight, any unusual noise or sensation sends me into a mess.

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    Mute Daisy Chainsaw
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:23 PM

    Make sure you get an aisle seat, don’t look out the windows and put yourself in the mindframe that it’s like being on a bus. A few turns, a few ups and downs, maybe the odd bump. I hate take off and landing, but up in the air, I’m fine. Once we start taxiing, it’s headphones on, head down in a book or magazine and I do my best to block out what’s happening outside. I do the same with landing, but I tend to brace myself by holding on to the seat in front. I’ve found that blocking out external forces has helped me. Child logic at it’s best… If I can’t see it, it’s not happening.

    Just look at the fact that you’ve flown before and that you got through it safely. I hope you have a normal, straightforward flight next week. Don’t think of the flight… think of where you’re going.

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    Mute Dave Davis
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    Jul 11th 2014, 4:47 PM

    Statistically, the safest place to sit on a plane is within 3 rows from an exit. Any exit. The majority of aircraft fatalities have occurred inside the cabin while trying to get out. I always pay for an exit row for this reason. I’m short, I don’t need the extra leg space. In the event of a fire in the cabin, I’ll be happy to not have to wait for 50-100 people to take their time getting out ahead of me.

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    Mute Kerry Blake
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:27 PM

    Indeed easy cure take a boat.

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    Mute William Grogan
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:42 PM

    Travelling by boat is FAR more dangerous. MS Estonia, was a cruise ferry built in 1979/80 at the German shipyard Meyer Werft in Papenburg. The ship sank in 1994 in the Baltic Sea. It is the deadliest shipwreck disaster to have occurred in the Baltic Sea in peacetime, costing 852 lives. Herald of Free Enterprise was a roll-on roll-off (RORO) ferry which capsized moments after leaving the Belgian port of Zeebrugge on the night of 6 March 1987, killing 193 passengers and crew. MV Sewol (Korean) occurred on 16 April 2014 en route from Incheon towards Jeju. The Japanese-built South Korean ferry capsized while carrying 476 people, mostly secondary school students from Danwon High School. Only 172 survivors, 304 died….. I could continue

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    Mute Munster2014
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    Jul 11th 2014, 3:40 PM

    Yes, take a boat to Spain and spend a quarter of your holiday getting there in the first place. Idiot.

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    Mute Colm Healy
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    Jul 11th 2014, 1:50 PM

    My fear is any form of transport with more than 4 other members of traveling public, buses, trains, planes, large taxis footpaths, swimming pools etc

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    Mute Capt Tom Bunn LCSW
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    Jul 13th 2014, 7:52 PM

    Is it really important to establish why their fear of flying began and what triggered it. Cognitive-oriented therapists believe fear must be learned. But fear of flying is not learned. If it were a learned response due to a bad flight, why did not all the passengers learn to fear flying?

    Cognitive therapists are wrong. Fear of flying is not the result of something learned; it is the result of something NOT LEARNED. Fear when flying is the natural result of never having learned how to regulate anxiety except through being in control or able to escape.

    About half of adults control emotions by controlling every situation or by maintaining a way to escape from it. The other half of us are easy-going; we regulate anxiety automatically and unconsciously. We don’t even know we are unconsciously regulating our arousal. Even when we are not in control, we don’t feel anxious. We don’t understand why anyone would.

    If you have not developed the ability to self-regulate without control or escape, you have to be in control to maintain your emotional equilibrium. You know if you get on the plane, you may have a melt down. There is nothing irrational about avoiding a situation where you know you can’t maintain emotional control.

    Most advice on how to control fear, anxiety, and panic when flying is – to say the least – of doubtful value. Yes, it may help to take deep breaths before the flight, but breathing exercises are completely useless during flight. Unfortunately, the fear of flying courses offered by airlines teach participants to depend upon breathing exercises. During the group flight, participants do well. Thus, the pilots and therapists who run these courses genuinely believe the breathing exercises work. But participants are not calm because of the breathing exercises; they are calm because of the group support and reassurance by the pilots that everything is alright. When the course participants try to fly six months later, they are back where they started. Or, worse, believing that nothing can help.

    Though airline courses don’t provide adequate help – nor are most therapists equipped to provide it – effective help is available via the best-selling book on the subject, “SOAR: The Breakthrough Treatment for Fear of Flying.

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    Mute Clodagh fox
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    Jul 12th 2014, 4:17 AM

    I’m not a great flyer at all, and have on occasions in the past not flown because of it. I happen to mention this to my manager in work and he was superb at giving me some perspective… He told me to listen to what I’m telling myself etc the plane is going to crash…. And to challenge this voice every time as it’s meant to be your ally and not your enemy! Works for me :) I’ve travelled loads in the last few years!!

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    Mute Steven Byrne
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    Jul 11th 2014, 2:46 PM

    Have a nice big shot of adrenaline before you get on the plane that will calm your nerves

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    Mute Harley Buckner
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    Oct 14th 2014, 2:44 PM

    You wrote: Dos & Donts For Nervous Flyers – You should speak to one or two REAL nervous flyers before being so flippant.
    Do: Remember that flying is the safest form of transport – Tell that to the poor souls in ‘Air Crash investigations’.
    Do: Visit an airport when you are not flying – To watch happy people going on Holiday while I stay at home.No thanks
    Do: Make your concerns know to cabin crew – Tell strangers ? Never – I have some pride left
    Do: Arrive early at the airport to avoid stress – The longer in the Terminal the longer the terror
    Do: Eat well – how can you if your stomach is in a Knot
    Do: Consider taking a course to overcome your fears – Done that, got on the Plane, got off before take off. Asked not to come back
    Don’t: Keep your fears to yourself – Announce to others passengers I have a fear the wings will drop off – really?
    Don’t: Stay up all night worrying about the flight – You are obviously not a nervous flyer
    Don’t: Drink alcohol before or during a flight – For some its the only way to get on a Plane
    Don’t: Grip your arm rest – I knew that my letting go of the Armrest will guarantee the Plane will fall from the sky.
    Don’t: Stay in your seat for the duration of the flight – Don’t be silly, I could not possibly get out of my seat.
    Don’t: Let your fear of flying ruin your holiday – now you’re being ridiculous. I haven’t flown for 30 years and can’t remember what a Beach is

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    Mute Cathal Leonard
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    Jul 12th 2014, 5:37 AM

    Let’s face it, if God had intended us to fly he would have bought us tickets

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