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Irish Water boss John Tierney during his previous post as Dublin city manager Mark Stedman/Photocall Ireland

The Briefcase: Everyone hates Irish Water, Nama dramas and R.I.P. Nokia

This was the week in business.

AS A LAND than almost boasts more quangos than citizens, you would think that the people of Ireland might take a philosophical approach when dealing with the quirks of the semi-state bodies.

Not so, it would seem, when it comes to probably the most-hated of all quasi-autonomous non-governmental organisations (try saying that three times fast).

The mere mention of the words Irish Water has been enough to send people into a fit of rage with the multiple whammies of the despised water charges, staff bonuses and data-protection concerns.

But after all those teething problems, things couldn’t get much worse right? Well, read on to see how things for Irish Water managed to slide even further downhill as we recap the week that was in business:

Need to know

How not to make friends and influence people, Irish Water style

From millions in consultants’ fees to bonuses for staff who “needed improvement”, there were already many (well at least 14) reasons why the public might be angry about Irish Water – aside, of course, from being hit with yet another charge after years of tax increases and austerity.

But, after already raising concerns by asking people for their PPS numbers as part of their applications, Irish Water hit a new low when TheJournal.ie revealed the utility had sent the bank details of 10 customers to their landlords in error.

Not exactly confidence-inspiring stuff. And to make matters worse, one of the affected customers said he had tried to take the problem up with the organisation, but hit a brick wall over the phone, email and Twitter.

tumblr_mir0puPMG81rjvyh0o1_r1_250 district9andthreequarters district9andthreequarters

The breach followed Irish Water’s apology last month to over 6,000 customers who received letters intended for other people.

Since then there have been renewed calls for the head of Irish Water CEO John Tierney, including from the now-sacked minister who had a major hand in setting up the quango.

There was also a two-man “kitchenware revolution” outside Leinster House, banging pots and pans to protest against Irish Water. As you do.

Meanwhile, Environment Minister Alan Kelly said Irish Water would simply need to deal with customers “in a fantastic way” after all the controversies.

New Taxi Signs Environment Minister Alan Kelly Laura Hutton / Photocall Ireland Laura Hutton / Photocall Ireland / Photocall Ireland

Far be it for us to offer suggestions on how a quango with a €50 million consultancy budget should go about its business, but a good start could be to answer the phone when a customer whose details you have just leaked to their landlord decides to call.

Nice to know

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Now you know

  • Tesco released its latest financial results and they made for some very ugly reading. The once all-powerful UK supermarket giant has taken a 92% haircut to its profits over the last six months – a period which has included a management shakeup, a €334 million accounting blunder and its chairman announcing plans to step down
  • Uber raised some eyebrows and blood pressures with its short-lived promotion in the French city of Lyon. The plan was to get “incredibly hot chicks” to drive around customers for a few days under the slogan “who said women don’t know how to drive?”. But the idea was quickly pulled after the ride-sharing company was accused of sexism

Avions Avions de Chasse girls were to feature in the Uber promotion before it was pulled Avions de chasse / YouTube Avions de chasse / YouTube / YouTube

One for the road

In loving memory of Nokias past, here’s a video that puts forward a compelling case for why people should buy a 3310 (release date circa 2000), the “Chuck Norris of mobile phone”, over those overrated iPhone 6 things.

A couple of good reasons: the battery lasts for three weeks and all the games come free. Snake anyone?

MaximBady / YouTube

READ: Big pharma, the price of power and a little thing called the Budget >

READ: Budget busters, more budget babble and startups as far as the eye can see >

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26 Comments
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    Mute jerry slattery
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    Mar 14th 2020, 6:37 AM

    Thoughts and prayers are with you all. I would think you are probably better off self isolating for the foreseeable future. Sone people still think this is over hyped and will stand inline in supermarkets for an hour with hundreds of others having no idea how dangerous it is

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    Mute Philip King ⚡️
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    Mar 14th 2020, 6:38 AM

    @jerry slattery: couldn’t agree more.

    Listen to this expert on Joe Rogan.

    https://youtu.be/cZFhjMQrVts

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    Mute stephen mc galey
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:43 AM

    @jerry slattery: it’s not over hype…but people do still need to buy stuff. For many reasons.
    If someone is vulnerable and might have to self isolate,then they are gonna have to have some kind of food stock etc.
    People doing their normal shopping.
    And people just going in for their couple of bits. Going in and buying a whole aisle of beans and toilet paper is ridiculous. But if we were to go by what your saying,we be starved to death or people who will be self isolateing would have nothing at home or anyway of getting it

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    Mute Matthew O'Kane ☘️✊#ONLYBERNIEBEATSTRUMP
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    Mar 14th 2020, 11:00 AM

    @jerry slattery: do a bit of gaming and streaming online with some friends its very socialable with the danger

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    Mute Matthew O'Kane ☘️✊#ONLYBERNIEBEATSTRUMP
    Favourite Matthew O'Kane ☘️✊#ONLYBERNIEBEATSTRUMP
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    Mar 14th 2020, 11:00 AM

    @Matthew O’Kane ☘️✊#ONLYBERNIEBEATSTRUMP: without

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    Mute Eoin McLove
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:02 AM

    Thanks for article Benat.
    .
    Govt should run ad campaign with each ad focusing on a high risk individual like yourself

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    Mute Sea Graham
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:37 AM

    I cant work from home, so I’m one of the people that still have to get on public transport for work. Yesterday the utter stupidity I was witnessing in Dublin is beyond belief. Some people have not got a clue about basic hygiene let alone what they should be doing now! Guy on the bus touching all the hand rails on tha bus. Sits down and starts to eat with his hands and lick his fingers clean. People waiting in line at shops breathing down each others necks. Packed pubs in Temple Bar. Choughing without covering their mouth. A person in a deli, wearing gloves but wiping their face and then going to serve the next person. I’m doing my best to keep myself and any others I have to interact with as safe as possible but, we seem to be a minority.

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    Mute Philip King ⚡️
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:56 AM

    @Sea Graham: buy a bicycle if possible. Stay safe

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    Mute Sea Graham
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:13 AM

    @Philip King ⚡️: would if I could. I live in the back of beyond in relation to work.

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    Mute Sean Ryan
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:36 AM

    @Sea Graham: I hate the bus too. public transport is bad at the best of time and this situation amplifies it. People are thick is seems. The amount of people who still won’t cover their mouth when coughing is crazy. I saw a child lick a window this week (the child was just being a child) but the parent was watching and thought it was hilarious. I said “you’d want to be careful” to the parent in a friendly manner and was given a dirty look. You can’t win against that mentality.

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    Mute Sea Graham
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:43 AM

    @Sean Ryan: the only up side is that what is normally a 3-4 hour daily commute is down to down to an hour and 20 because of people working from home and schools closed.

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    Mute Sean Ryan
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:00 AM

    @Sea Graham: yes, it’s an ill wind…

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    Mute Michael Brennan
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:02 AM

    @Sea Graham: I actually can work from home so I guess I’m one of the lucky ones. But you’re right on the money. How on earth can social distancing work in a night club? Imagine all those young people staying 3 feet away from each other while dancing. Or shouting in each others ears because of loud music. Hey sit everyone in a restaurant 3 feet away from each other while the waiting staff – who of necessity have to breach the 3ft rule – move freely between them. Something has not been thought through properly here. Stay safe.

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    Mute Miriam
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:24 AM

    You young people with CF have been constantly in my thoughts. I’ve tried to remind my family not to be blithe with their words saying “it’s just a cold” “what’s all the fuss” etc. Only the other day I realised after a while the lady I was talking to had a 21 son with CF. It’s serious for so many people.

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    Mute Liam Higgins
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:45 AM

    As a kidney dialysis patient, I am also compromised. So much so that I have to miss my own mothers funeral this weekend

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    Mute Anna Marie O Brien
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    Mar 14th 2020, 10:58 AM

    @Liam Higgins: very, very, sorry to hear that Liam. That is the extremely hard reality you are facing, I am in a high risk group myself and it is all very worrying. RIP to your mum

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    Mute EillieEs
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    Mar 14th 2020, 11:53 AM

    @Liam Higgins: gosh that is really awful for you but she’d want you to stay safe. Condolences on the death of your mother RIP

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    Mute James Lane
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:28 PM

    @Liam Higgins: please accept my sincere condolences on your mothers passing. This must be heart breaking for you especially. You have to though think of your own health now and protect yourself the very best you can. The country is full of self interest only people who’s ignorance and behaviour is beyond their thinking capabilities. Look after yourself and please god we will all get through this crisis together from another person with a compromised immune system..

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    Mute Nuala Mc Namara
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:41 AM

    We ALL have to follow the Expert advice like Benat has said not just for the sake of ourselves and our families and friends but for our communities and those in the vulnerable Catergories which includes children and not just older people with underlying conditions.We have to keep other people safe as well as ourselves.
    There was a special Late Late show last night mostly about the situation we’re facing right down with tips,advice and information.It showed what to do if someone in your house has to self isolate &it had different rooms and showed what to do in each room.The programme also showed what to do with the person’s laundry, rubbish,meals,etc.It was excellent &worth watching.
    Benat,thank you so much for your article reminding us that children and people in vulnerable catergories need us to act responsibly together to do our best to keep them safe from cross infection.

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    Mute Woolly
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:55 AM

    @Nuala Mc Namara: but on social media the usual piss take about their efforts to educate us we are moronic

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    Mute James Lane
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:32 PM

    @Woolly: just ignore the ass holes whose brains are up their arse. If they were in the category of those most at risk they would be singing a different song you can take that to the bank.

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    Mute Eoin McLove
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:05 AM

    Can believe UK have thrown real people like yourself, Benat, to the dogs with their herd immunity approach and ignoring what worked in Asia.

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    Mute Lucille Ball
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:30 AM

    My heart goes out to you and all CF patients.. it’s so worrying for you now, keep well

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    Mute Ben Dunne
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    Mar 14th 2020, 11:18 AM

    It’s not just Cf. I work with the public and I’ve got Rheumatoid Arthritis. I’m on an immunosuppressant so I’m vulnerable. At the same time I’ve a mortgage and bills to pay. I’m sure there’s a lot more conditions out there and many more people in a similar situation than first realised.

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    Mute MitchConnor
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:53 AM

    Unfortunately many people don’t get it through their thick heads until they or loved ones are affected . Might have two weeks off but instead of isolation on behave of others even they want to go clubbing or out like Christmas came early.

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    Mute Conall
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:22 AM

    Immunosuppressed myself and it does make you somewhat paranoid – though in this case, they ARE after you. At least, I already have the mindset of avoiding illness. Should you seal yourself in or live as normally as possible?

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    Mute Miriam
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:26 AM

    @Conall: I know what you mean, it’s a hard call! I’d seal in for a few weeks anyway and maybe judge it again then!

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    Mute Úna O Connor Barrett
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    Mar 14th 2020, 9:44 AM

    Stay safe x

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    Mute Damon16
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    Mar 14th 2020, 10:17 AM

    If you know any selfish people taking a cavalier attitude to do this, send them a link to this article.

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    Mute James Coyle
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    Mar 14th 2020, 7:19 AM

    So- do you know what’s been happening to CF patients in China & Italy, please?

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    Mute Sea Graham
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    Mar 14th 2020, 8:15 AM

    @James Coyle: the Italian government seem to be abandoning their citizens and as for China they are just spouting bs. They don’t take care of their own at the best of times

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    Mute Maeve Hodgins
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    Mar 14th 2020, 4:46 PM

    Very good points Benat hoping you can stay clear of this. It must be a horribly worrying time for you and all your family. Please people cop on and do what you’re told.

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    Mute Caroline Broderick
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    Mar 16th 2020, 12:10 PM

    Well done Benny great article x

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