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BEFORE KIDS, I was adamant that Christmas shouldn’t start until December – the second week would be just fine, thank you very much. Jingle Bells on the airwaves any earlier than that just felt wrong. Christmas was about nights out as much as nights in, about finding the perfect sparkly dress for the office party, and panic shopping on the 24th for the last few bits. It was a perfectly nice time of year, but I couldn’t understand all the fuss in the lead-up.
A decade later, I get it. And I’m in. Bring it on – all of it. The letters, the stockings, the advent calendar, the nativity play, even the shopping (kind of). I’ve learnt a lot about Christmas since having kids:
1. Sending letters to Santa is a big deal
Once upon a time, I thought this was just a nice childhood tradition carried forward through the generations. Now as I stand over my seven-year-old, waiting for her to write “Anna Sleigh” and not “Elsa Snow-Glow doll”, I understand the importance of the letter.
Santa needs to know as soon as possible what each child wants, and he doesn’t have the admin team in place to manage last minutes changes of mind. I wait, watching my daughter with her pencil poised, biting back the urge to say “just write Anna Sleigh!” and I let her do it herself. She does. I whip it away, seal it in an envelope, and suggest we go straight to the post-box. Santa isn’t taking any chances.
2. Starting Christmas in November might just make sense
Quite apart from the practical requirement to start early (especially if going to work and looking after kids is curtailing your ability to get to the shops) there’s the FUN of the lead-up. While Christmas ads in September are annoying, come midnight on October 31st, I’m ready to embrace all things yuletide. Our enjoyment of any particular event doesn’t last afterwards (a week after Christmas, we won’t still have lingering happiness – we’ll just be depressed about the extra half stone) so it’s worth making the most of the lead-up. At least that’s how I’m justifying shopping in November and playing Fairy Tale of New York on a loop.
3. Going to bed early on Christmas Eve has a purpose
What’s the deal with getting kids to bed early on Christmas Eve, I wondered? Why all the effort into convincing them on just this one day, when everything is back to normal 364 days a year? But then, realisation. Santa has a hell of a lot to do on Christmas Eve, and wide awake kids impede his plans significantly. Especially a child who keeps coming downstairs to beg her parents to go to bed, because she’s afraid Santa won’t come if they’re still up. We may have overplayed this hand.
4. Some toys are a terrible idea
I remember being allowed to write one present each year on my letter to Santa, and that it could be anything I wanted. In reality, there was probably a little parental nudge here and there – “hmmm, Barbie Dream House you say – what about the lovely Sindy horse instead?”
And likewise today, much as I might have imagined letting my kids have free-choice, some toys are less desirable than others. One child wanted the Nerf Rebelle Bow and Arrow this year, so I gently explained to her that she could only use it outdoors and it might rain on Christmas Day. Another wants a chocolate lolly-pop maker, because she thinks it means infinite supplies of lollies on tap. Her chocolate coin maker of two years ago is still hiding in the attic. A messy lesson learned.
5. Nativity play clichés are true
TV and films tell us that school nativity plays take place during work hours; that parents get caught up in meetings and almost miss them, that kids fluff lines but it’s OK because it’s cute, and that mothers in the audience cry. Unlike some other parenting clichés in the movies (waters breaking in big gush, anyone?) this one is true.
Until last year, I never realised that sitting in a crowded, stuffy hall, holding a wriggling toddler, watching tiny four-year-olds on stage could be such an overwhelmingly gorgeous experience and could make me cry – even when the play is about aliens who land in Bethlehem on the night that Jesus is born.
6. There is nothing on TV on Christmas Eve
For our first Christmas Eve staying in, we looked forward to watching some great Christmas films and seasonal specials on TV. Browsing the RTE Guide revealed however that there was nothing on. We ended up watching American Gangster. I don’t know why we thought that was a good idea – seasonal and joy-filled it was not. Last year was the same – the choice was Christmas with the Kranks or Midsomer Murders. But we had anticipated the TV wasteland that awaited us, and had borrowed Scrooged on DVD. We’re learning. Though not at any great pace – we’ve nothing lined up for this year (suggestions welcome!)
7. Nobody told the kids about the lie-ins
Do your small kids get up at 6.30 or 7am every morning? Mine too. And it turns out they still do that on Christmas Day and on St Stephen’s Day and every day of the Christmas holidays. This has been happening in our house for seven years now, and it’s still a shock to the system.
8. The magic
When Christmas was about the office party and the sparkly dress and the lazy mornings, it was good. But it was missing some magic, and with kids, the magic is back. I’m transported back to my own childhood – believing in something again. Watching them looking for a flash of light in the black sky. Leaving out a carrot and a cookie, in just the right spot. The flurry to bed, the anxious checking of time. Hearing sleigh bells while trying to sleep; seeing a blur of red through the keyhole. The morning pitter-patter, the whispers. The descent down the stairs, and hesitant turning of door-handle. What if he’s sill there? He’s not! But he was here – there’s no doubting that. It’s magic.
And that’s mostly what I’ve learned about Christmas since having children – there’s are good reasons behind the traditions, it really is all about the kids, and the magic is well and truly back. Happy Christmas!
Andrea Mara has three small kids, one tall husband and one office job. She writes at OfficeMum.ie about being a parent, being a mother working outside the home, and being a woman in the workplace. She’s just trying to keep her balance. Follow her tweets@office_mum or on Facebook.
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We can’t talk about Palestine, but we can talk about the rain.
@Dan Breen: It’s raining bombs in Palestine
@Dan Breen: meant to be free speech in this country, but they don’t want us to speak up for Palestine
@Dan Breen: would telling strangers you opinion be something important to you?
@Murro: ah yeah…hamas. The great freedom fighters. Just like the IRA. They blew up innocent women and children too.
@Alison Hughes: that’s how they get their dopamine
@Alison Hughes: but hamas isn’t Palestine just like IRA isn’t Ireland
@Joe Doe: never said they were! They are, however, the ones firing rockets from hospitals, from behind ambulances and taking civilian hostages….you know, the stuff real hero’s do!
@Alison Hughes: No comparison with the 2 groups,as per usual ridiculous statement to wind people up,do you ever get out ?
@Alison Hughes: which the Israelis have been doing for years. Two wrongs don’t make a right.
@Alison Hughes: That does not justify what Israel is doing to the people of Gaza. It’s monstrous, and if you can’t see that you are wilfully blind.
@Murro: there’s a big difference between free speech and the verbal diarrhoea the usual suspects spout in the comment section. Ruins it for everyone.
@Dan Breen: why can’t we talk about the two women attacked by XLBULLY in Waterford.
@Dan Breen: The article ‘Humanitarian crisis deepens etc” in the last paragraph quotes the UN as saying that more than 100 Palestinians have been killed since 7 Oct. This is extremely disingenuous.
Why is the journal publishing that obvious falsehood? (I note that it does quote the health ministry in Gaza, “7,703 people, more than 3,000 of them children”, which is much more plausible.
Many thousands of Palestinians have been killed in the ongoing bombings, far more than died in the 7 Oct attacks.
Israel is behaving like a terrorist state, in response to the original Hamas attacks, (which were also very wrong).
@Dan Breen: Genocide needs to be manufactured in the the media and made acceptable in people minds before it’s manufactured in reality – we had punch magazine in the 1840′s we have western media today. Portray Palestinians as animals, inflame people with propaganda against them, shut down dissent, target journalists, create mass confusion and then release the hounds. The hounds are officially released now, this not a war on Hamas – it’s a good old fashioned settler colonial genocide. We need to accurately identify, then break the ‘propaganda machine’ to stop these wars
@Alison Hughes: time to call a halt to brutality in the holy land
@Dan Breen: we are a little wet rock on the edge of Europe, we have no say, the sooner Irish people wake up and grow up, the better
@kerrill thornhill: still never answered my question to you earlier, where do you stand on the Russian invasion of Ukraine?
@Alison Hughes: Did u ever stop to think why this is happening ? Why Hamas are even there Go get your facts before u put texts up
@Joe x: I’ve been asked this question on many threads Joe. The occupations in Palestine & Ukraine needs to end with an immediate ceasefire and negotiated settlement. We gave Ukraine $150bn in weapons & print their propoagand unfiltered, we give Israel billions to bomb caged Palestinians and print their propaganda unfiltered. Ireland housed 70,000 Ukranian refugees, but no Palestinians, while our media cover up Israeli war crimes killing 3000 kids already: Go ahead take a look at the names, real flesh and blood. The utter white supremacy of EU/US treating these kids like meat https://twitter.com/jvplive/status/1718287003769614735?t=iZPhll18Q0bwYIX3Gyd19Q&s=19
@kerrill thornhill: “We” did not send money for arms anywhere near the middle east. What we did send were troops on peacekeeping duties in the area, several of whom never came home
.
In terms of Ukraine, yes, we did send non-lethal aid and give refuge, and while you claim support in the first sentence of your reply, the rest of your reply seems to begrudge the Ukrainians that aid. As to giving Palestinians refuge, they never needed it until Hamas kicked off the current round of troubles
@kerrill thornhill: Now, I am going to ask a very simple question. How much do you know of the full history over there?
And just do you know, I support niether side. As far as I am concerned, they are both as bad as each other and, quite frankly, our troops should be brought home, along with all peacekeeping troops in the area and let them fight it out.
@Dan Breen: yes. Why are comments closed on anything but the weather?
Varadkars comments about having to double down on our assistance to the Ukraine both financially and militarily do not represent the wishes of the electorate.
Why are no FFG ministers calling for peace . Why are they warmongering
@BL Music: If Russia took its troops out of Ukraine the fighting would stop – it’s not that complicated.
@BL Music: Don’t let that troll Alison Hughes have you say a bad word on the worse Irish government to have been ever in power
Worst
@Kilkenny Proud: Yes: supporting Ukraine’s self-defence is not ‘warmongering’ no matter how many times that lie is repeated.
@BL Music: You do NOT speak for me !
@BL Music: the guys committing the war crimes hold the purse strings and the levers of power in the West.
@BL Music: Russia chose not to attend the ongoing UN peace talks, because they are not interested in peace.
@BL Music: Slava Hamas and Hezbollah!
Going to be flooding because the rivers are half full and the ground is saturated.
@P. V. Aglue: Looks like it. Glad to see flood works going on, hope they’re completed before the weather gets worse in December & January.
A lot of people have concreted over front gardens, maybe we should be doing more to drain water off?
In the meantime ban all pit bulls. Who needs such wretched dogs, get a golden retriever or similar …
@JP: Agreed $cummy dogs with scrotey owners.
Ban those bloody dogs already!
We lucky it only rain the poor people of Palestine being mder by the thousands. While the west dose nothing. And any one whom supports the pal people is labelled a hamas supporter. Israel have played this very well they scarified a few of their own. To be allowed take control when they finished with Palestine they wont leave the will stay there probably with the UN labelled under some peace treaty and time like the rest of the region become is rale. Thats why they keep saying Gaza cause most will presume it a city in israel.
@J M: what?
israel needs to be stopped
@Joe Doyle: And Hamas too?
@Hugh De Payans: no just israel
Thought so. You think those Israeli babies deserved to be beheaded?
They are both as bad as each other….Remember what kicked this this round of violence off seversl weeks ago.!
Never mind the rain as the world sits back as those poor people in their Palestinian homeland are terrorised by an illegal occupier of their land
Something to do with Leo
@Mary Toilet: homophobes unite: blame Leo for everything, even the rain
Norma Foley is a tranny.
Mary loves her far-right rim-jobs!
That Eileen Gleeson is a lovely bit of skirt
@Mary Toilet: Scissor ze quimbers!
have your say