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THE APPOINTMENT OF Boris Johnson, the leading Brexit campaigner and former mayor of London, as the UK’s new foreign secretary, made headlines around the world last night.
German presenters could barely contain their mirth as they announced the news, apparently…
The former prime minister of Sweden said he hoped the appointment was a joke…
And even Cher chipped in, with her reaction…
To describe the ex-mayor as gaffe-prone would be something of an understatement – so the reaction to his appointment as the UK’s top diplomat certainly comes as no surprise.
Johnson has been insulting people, and apologising for those same insults, for years.
In no particular order, here is a list of world figures, countries, cities and random citizens of the world Boris has had a pop at in the last few decades…
Johnson took a pop at the US president during the Brexit campaign, after Obama voiced his opposition to the pro-Leave movement.
Writing for the Sun, the Tory recounted a story of a bust of Churchill being removed from the White House after the Obamas moved in.
According to Johnson:
No one was sure whether the President had himself been involved in the decision. Some said it was a snub to Britain. Some said it was a symbol of the part-Kenyan President’s ancestral dislike of the British Empire – of which Churchill had been such a fervent defender.
Always an equal-opportunities offender, Johnson took aim at the presumptive Republican nominee after the businessman implied that parts of London were no-go areas.
Said Boris:
The only reason I wouldn’t visit some parts of New York is the real risk of meeting Donald Trump.
Johnson was forced to apologise for referring to black people as “piccaninnies” during the campaign for the London mayoralty in 2008.
In a column published six years previously in the Telegraph, he had mocked Tony Blair’s globetrotting:
What a relief it must be for Blair to get out of England. It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving piccaninnies.
The piece also mentioned “watermelon smiles”.
Johnson said he was ”sad” that people had been offended but insisted the words had been taken out of context.
Johnson wrote in 2005 that the importance of the world’s most populous nation was being overplayed.
“We do not need to teach babies Mandarin,” he maintained.
Compared with the old British Empire, and the new American imperium, Chinese cultural influence is virtually nil, and unlikely to increase.
The President of Turkey
Johnson won £1,000 from the Spectator earlier this year when the magazine ran a contest for offensive poems about Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan.
A former editor of the Spectator, Johnson composed the limerick in response to Erdogan’s decision to take legal action over a German comedian’s poem about him.
Here it is:
There was a young fellow from Ankara
Who was a terrific wankerer
Till he sowed his wild oats
With the help of a goat
But he didn’t even stop to thankera.
Back in 2004, the Tory MP was sent to Liverpool by his party leader to apologise in person for a magazine article that criticised the city’s reaction to the death of Ken Bigley, who was abducted and killed in Iraq.
Johnson wrote in an editorial in The Spectator that the city was wallowing in “disproportionate” grief following his death. Liverpudlians, he added, “wallow” in their “victim status”.
Michael Howard, the then-Conservative boss, sent him north to say sorry, noting that the article was “nonsense from beginning to end”.
Johnson was forced to apologise again in 2006, after linking Papua New Guinea to “cannibalism and chief-killing” in his newspaper column.
“I meant no insult to the people of Papua New Guinea who I’m sure lead lives of blameless bourgeois domesticity in common with the rest of us,” Johnson said later, after the country’s High Commissioner in London complained.
He said he was happy to “add Papua New Guinea to my global itinerary of apology”.
He called them “great supine protoplasmic invertebrate jellies”. Which is pretty creative, in fairness.
Not so much an insult, more of a full-on attack…
Johnson knocked the Japanese boy to the ground during a rugby match while on an official visit to the country – taking the 10-year-old out with a harsh tackle as he raced down the pitch with the ball.
It wasn’t even a real rugby match, it should be pointed out – it was a press event where participants pretended to play for the cameras.
The then-mayor of London later apologised, and gave the child a rugby ball.
Oh, and before we go… He also once temporarily crippled a German footballer by headbutting him in the groin during a charity soccer match.
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Has anyone else noticed that since this covid 19 started, that the weather has been amazing, the skies have been clearer and the water taste better
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: Maybe this is Mother Natures way of putting us back in our box.
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: How’s business these days?
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: Amazing weather??? It’s been cold. Lower than the average monthly temperature for March.
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: Do you think the fact it’s spring might be a factor?
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: It is the time of year for the weather to be like this. Maybe you’ve been too busy to notice those things before?
@Logan Shepherd: I’ve learned I need to slow down and enjoy things more. Career change may be in order after this.
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: as a golfer that went out in the bad weather and mud for 5 months, yes I noticed the last 5 weeks.
@Nakedcleanersireland.com: Really ? Lashed rain all day yesterday in the south-east.
17 degrees,, yaaaay if I could only go out it would be great
@John kavanagh: why can’t you get out?
Oh dear we will pay for this. Stand by for claims of the hottest April on record, mumbling about carbon tax from Fianma Gael, talk of banning turf and daysul
Think I will dust off the bbq and stock up on a few beers.
@Richard:
Now that sounds like a brilliant plan BBQ in the back garden, good ole bit of craic over the fence with the neighbours while social distancing.
Gonna give the old BBQ a damn good scrubbing and text the neighbours..
I’ll raise a glass to you Richard.
@Justice Mickey: we’re still talking about an outdoor charcoal grill type cooking device here right, and not something else? You see where my confusion could’ve come from, you getting all excited, giving something a good scrubbing, messaging the neighbours! Or have I ‘swung’ to the wrong conclusion mate! Either way, enjoy it man!
@ThatLJD:
Hahaha, that’s 2 flipping great ideas on the same thread …
*looking for my drill*
@Justice Give the old drill a cleaning as well.
Sounds like my drinking habits
Biggest drop in Co2 emmissions since WW2, I have noticed bright sunny skies colder nights with less cloud coverage , maybe the climate change deniers can now stay quiet given that there is actual evidence to prove fewer car journeys, flights , indutries closing etc actial makes a difference .
https://www.rte.ie/news/coronavirus/2020/0403/1128226-fall-in-co2-emissions-could-be-greatest-since-ww2/
@John Judd: No one denies climate change, only the affect humans have on it.
Great. I might be able to leave the heating off for a bit longer and light the stove a bit later. It has been really cold this spring, I’m still wearing thermals and ski mid-layers indoors.
Beautiful weather for a run along the river this morning. Definitely time for the BBQ and I’ll try out my first batch of home brew cider while I’m at it – May as well, not much else to do at the moment I guess.
FFS
throw on your shorts…
@The Great Cornholio: here’s hoping lose wind levels will allow us to feel that glorious warmth.
But, the weather is only sunny and nice 4km from my house at any given time. I can’t go more than 2km from my house. :)
have your say