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DESPITE GROWING AWARENESS, many children and adults are living with the trauma of parental alcohol misuse, according to Alcohol Action Ireland (AAI), but for now, there’s still a lack of awareness of this in the mental health services.
Today at the Royal College of Physicians, AAI launched the Silent Voices initiative to raise awareness of the trauma of growing up with a parent or carer who misuses alcohol.
Those behind the initiative – Carol Fawsitt, Marion Rackard and Barbara Whelan – said there is no dedicated service to support those have lived with the effects of that experience.
“There has been little or no progress made in Ireland to address the trauma inflicted on the child, which may last well into adulthood,” said Fawsitt, chair of the AAI, and one of the founders of Silent Voices.
Opening up
“Parental alcohol misuse, or the effect it has on children, rarely gets an air or an acknowledgement in Irish society”, Fawsitt said.
Right now, “dedicated services for children so impacted are non-existent – it’s hard to believe,” she added.
In the coming years, the initiative wants to grow awareness of the harm alcohol can cause others, by working with practitioners and service providers. They will be engaging in national signposting services, so those seeking help will find it easier to know who to contact, and what to expect.
The initiative wants to “open up” Ireland’s relationship with alcohol, said Fawsitt, and to have “the trauma of growing up in a house with alcohol abuse recognised as a trauma”.
By opening a conversation, she said, “and recognising the harms of parental alcohol misuse”, they hope that “teachers, youth leaders and family members will become more vigilant and become aware of whom to reach out to when an intervention is required.”
In her own experience, Fawsitt said that services, such as counselling “often don’t recognise the link between parental alcohol misuse and trauma in adult children”. For service providers, she said, “a greater recognition of parental alcohol misuse harm is critical”.
Barriers to getting help
With parental alcohol misuse, there is huge loyalty to parent, says Whelan, one of the drivers behind Silent Voices.
Whelan has had mental health difficulties as a result of her experience of parental alcohol misuse. She spoke of feeling guilt, and the belief that “you don’t deserve help”, alongside the fear of speaking about it to family.
“On top of that again, it’s because it’s not really well-known; it’s not seen,” she told The Journal.
So we have all these barriers to getting help. If we could open up the conversation, it may be the case that people could begin to recognise things at an earlier stage.
“If I had known something about the long-term impacts of growing up with parental alcohol misuse, I would have gone for help 10 years earlier than I did,” she said.
“It’s not about blame; we need to stop the cycle of damage,” said Fawsitt, adding that services must be provided, and must be “trauma informed”.
The worry or anxiety experienced by a child in these situations can result in behavioural and emotional issues, according to Dr Sharon Lambert from the Department of Applied Psychology at University College Cork, who spoke at the launch.
Teachers and caregivers may be unable to identify the cause of these issues, and put it down to bad behaviour, “rather than recognise that a child is struggling”, said Lambert.
Well-informed education and healthcare professionals are vital to buffer the impact of parental problem drinking on children.
The usual response for mental health issues is to ‘go and speak to your GP”, Whelan says, stressing the difficulty in talking to a family doctor who treat the whole family, including the alcohol dependent parent, she said.
“So how can you talk to the GP?”
Alcohol Action Ireland estimates that approximately 400,000 people in Ireland today are adult children from alcohol-impacted families.
Silent Voices also plans to raise awareness by publishing anonymised personal stories of parental alcohol misuse on their online platform.
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I suffered from this. Truly, truly painful and debilitating every month. Back in the 80s I went on a course of treatment that was being trialed, a drug called Zolladex. I did it because I was desperate and it was free. I was also very young and naive. It was intrusive and it didn’t work. It strangled one of my ovaries I was warned I may never have children. 30 years later and I watch my daughter suffer from endometriosis. The treatment has not moved on. They could offer my daughter nothing except the “pill”. This could mean girls taking the pill for maybe 20 years in order to avoid pain. I’ve often wondered if men suffered from endometriosis would a cure have been discovered.
Very well written , the worst condition ever as nothing really anyone can do to help. Very little understanding of the condition with the majority believing it’s just a painful period when it can actually mean severe pain 3 weeks out of 4 and constant nausea , bloating , migraines , muscle pain , sciatica , painful bowel movements and emotional implications.
I believe if men had it no way would we not know the cause and surgery would definitely not be the only way to diagnose. Having lived with this no man would just take a painkiller and keep going .
We need to find a cure and make more awareness even in schools as majority starts experiencing symptoms then, as I did age 11 diagnosed age 27
@Lynn: men die younger, men have much higher rate of suicide, men have a much higher rate of homelessness……so what exactly is your point here?, I am sick and tired of listening to women who think they are getting a raw deal, the facts are they are not getting anything of the sort…..men have it worse in many many areas.
@Peter Hughes: He’s right ladies. We shouldn’t be concerned about a better diagnosis rate for a prevalent disease when men have problems too. Those should be addressed first and foremost because, as we all know, multiple things can’t be done at once. We really need to learn our place!
@Peter Hughes: @Peter Hughes: I’m sorry for complaining about my debilitating condition. I’m sorry that I have to go through this EVERY month for 30+ years. I’m sorry men can’t experience the pain, the discomfort, the sanitary issues, the cost of sanitary requirements, the intrusive procedures by numerous doctors and nurses and I’m sorry that women never get to experience homelessness, suicide, rape, absent fathers and man flu.
@2thFairy: Your mind is twisted against men, this has zero to do with men and somehow you managed to point the finger at men…..you need help.
@2thFairy: well said. We are not saying men don’t have problems we are simply saying if they had this condition no way would it have no known cause , no cure , no adequate treatments that don’t cause more side effects and can actually worsen the condition. It is a fact this is a woman’s disease a woman’s problem.
@Peter Hughes: stop acting as if men’s health isn’t taken more seriously. It is. When they suffer from pain, they aren’t shooed away with no help as women often are.
For most of medical history, the male body has been considered the “default” and even trials and tests done to treat women for issues affecting their reproductive organs were done on men. Who, as I’m sure you’re aware, don’t have them.
You can cry and claim to be the victim here but no woman is going to fall for it. She will see it for the blatant attention seeking and issue diverting tripe that it is.
You can deny how reality works all you like but it doesn’t change facts. Men do not have it worse. BTW more women attempt suicide but succeed less often than men.
This is an article about endometriosis. It is a condition that only women suffer from so it makes obvious sense that women will comment here about the pain and suffering it causes.
This condition is rarely bright up as a topic for discussion.
Unfortunately some men think we have no reason to even broach the subject at all.
Doctors are mostly men so they just dont care my daughter at 23 years of age not married some years ago was told to have a baby and she would be ok by a top consultant in the coombe hospital
@Margaret Kane: I’ve been told that too by multiple doctors, as recent as a few years ago.
I suffered bad with my periods starting in my teens, I didn’t realise that there was something wrong with me. I thought most women had such painful periods but I wasn’t strong enough to deal with them. Other women dismiss it as an excuse or moaning, doctors tell you to take some ibuprofen and a use a hot water bottle. I remember thinking as a 16 year old “how am I supposed to bring a hot water bottle to school with me?”. Instead I opted for those stick on heat patches for your back. Now in my late 20s I’m crippled by it. I waited two years for an app at the Combe after being told a few years previously that I probably had endometriosis at the well woman clinic. My doctors told me the same after a few USS showed nothing wrong. “it’s probably endometriosis, but you’re still young so don’t worry.”
Don’t worry? But there’s no treatment.
When I finally got to my long awaited appointment, I was told “yeah it’s probably endometriosis, get the coil or go on the pill.” and given some NSAIDs. That’s it, there’s nothing else they can do besides surgery, which probably won’t even help much and is likely to leave me infertile due to scarring.
While I feel like my country doesn’t care much about female health problems, the issue is there’s not actually much they can do to help. The treatments don’t exist.
There are so many women out there with the same story and just as many women that go undiagnosed as they think they just have to live with bad period pains. I was in my early twenties when I got the same wishy washy diagnosis and already I had lost an ovary.
I recognised the same condition in my daughter when she was 11 years old and I was shocked and horrified when I took her to the doctor to discover that 20 years later there was absolutely no advancement in treatment.
I chose not to put her through the endless intrusive prodding and operations because she was so young and there was still no cure except the pill.
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