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THE LONG SUMMER holidays from school are here – an annual occurrence that brings with it polarising feelings for children and their parents.
For kids, this is the best time of the year. Two months (three if they’re in the junior cycle
of secondary school) of carefree, structureless days when the sun never stops shining and
anything can happen.
For parents the vast swathe of time without the safety net of a classroom can come piled
high with guilt and stress.
How can you be a happy, anxiety-free parent during July and August? Here are three
simple steps to summer happiness – all you need to know to make these holidays good ones.
Step 1:
Go easy on yourself (the most important step of all). You know those people who post beautiful photos on social media of their family tucking into a gourmet picnic while hiking in the Comeraghs?
What they chose not to share was the temper-tantrum little Jimmy threw when they tried to get him into the car to even go on the trip or the row when they got lost on the way because Dad flatly refused to use the sat-nav (even though he clearly hadn’t a clue where he was going).
Part of Step 1 involves reciting this mantra: I love my kids and they love me even when we scream at one another and I think I never want to see them again.
It is worth remembering that most family therapists recommend emotional honesty – so a bit of shouting and roaring is actually beneficial, as long as no one holds a grudge and everyone hugs and makes up when it’s over.
Step 2:
Bribery is good. You want your kids to get outside in the sunshine, they want to
watch Netflix and play the Xbox.
How about a reward system: two hours playing outside (without a device) will earn them fifteen minutes of screen-time later on?
And the experts suggest we should place some limits on that screen-time. The World Health Organisation, in a study carried out with the American Heart Association in 2018, has proposed a threshold of one hour maximum with a device for kids from two to five, 90 minutes for children aged five to eight, and two hours for those aged eight to whatever age you can still exert some control.
That study showed that kids from 8 to 18 are spending as much as seven hours in front of screens, and the best way to dissuade them from this habit is to minimise the amount of time we as adults spend on our devices when they’re with us.
How about some family rules (which everyone will commit to) about no phones or tablets at the dinner table? And while you’re it, put down some other device free time periods throughout the day?
Verywellfamily.com (a parenting site moderated by social workers and family therapists)
suggests technology free spaces in the home – particularly bedrooms.
Think about it. If you don’t charge your phone or tablet in your bedroom, you’re going to be far less tempted to update your social media or send emails in the middle of the night.
Parents4success (a family support group from the UK) proposes screen-free days, where play dates with other kids are arranged and time is spent arranging and planning outdoor based, technology-free fun.
Coming up with activities during outdoor time is great, but it is also important that children learn how to amuse themselves. Having some basic play equipment outside (such as bikes, balls, racquets or swings) should be enough for your little darlings to come up with any number of games all by themselves.
From time to time (when you have 10 minutes to spare) pop out and join in. Show them how to expand a game or take an activity in a new direction and then leave them to play by themselves.
During family days out, devices can be used in the car during the drive there and back, but absolutely no phones/tablets when you arrive.
Step 3:
Ask for (and be prepared to accept) help. If you are a working parent, you simply
cannot be everywhere and do everything. Nana and grandad will probably be happy to help out with childcare over the summer months, but they have lives too so there is no shame using summer camps, kids clubs and friends to take up some of the slack.
A lot of creches run summer programmes for school-age kids, which will have been properly vetted and are required to adhere to national guidelines for curriculums and health and safety.
Despite what you might think, sending your kids to some form of daycare over the summer months will not cause emotional damage, so stop feeling guilty about it.
In fact, having other kids their own age to play with and a well-trained and experienced team of play-leaders will be a positive experience for them. You can maximise the time you do have together in the evenings by eating together or playing a family board game before bed.
Enjoy the summer everyone – it should be a great time for all the family.
Shane Dunphy is a child protection expert and author. He is Head of the Social Care Department at Waterford College of Further Education.
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In my opinion: I think if you present yourself to a hospital with flu like symptoms or flu in general and have not seen your GP or Caredoc services you should incur a whopper of a bill. Say €1000 regardless of VHI LAYA or medical card. I think that would surely stop people in there tracks. Going to the hospital so they can look down your gob feel your glands and tell you to rest and take paracetamol is a waste of time.
@Tom Harpur: Good man Tom , charge those tax payers even more .
Try get an appointment with your doctor , we can fit you in next Thursday .
@Tom Harpur: you don’t understand the nature of true influenza and its particular dangers for a number of categories of vulnerable persons. Patients are only admitted as a last resort. In A&E, patients with symptoms of influenza are triaged and usually treated as very low priority unless the symptoms indicate secondary infections and dangerous morbidities.
@Ken Hayden: if you can’t get a appointment with your doctor go to your out of hours doctor. No need to block up A&E just because you have a sniffle or sore throat
@Fiona deFreyne: I understand too well the true definition and feeling of influenza I’ve had it plus I’m in the at risk category so I get the jab. The last port of call should be the Emergency department for this if it’s bad you should be referred by your GP or out of hours doctor service.
@Tom Harpur: well said and people not at risk whose health is usually good – just get to bed – keep hydrated and stop spreading the love.
@Tom Harpur: Try to ring out of hours service in Dublin. You’ll get a fax machine. Search on google and you’ll see reviews from 2015 complaining about the same thing (phone number officially advertised is actually a fax number). Plenty of time to fix this if they actually cared about their services.
And we wonder you people are going to A&E for a flu.
@Tom Harpur: Normally anyone ending up in A&E with flu has other complications. The flu can be a very serious and even fatal illness, if you’ve certain underlying problems and also for some elderly people.
If more of us got flu vaccines, fewer of us would develop flu and the virus wouldn’t spread around so much. We might have something approaching herd immunity every year.
For the sake of 2 seconds of minor inconvenience, you educate your own immune system to kill off a nasty virus and avoid a ton of problems yourself and you won’t pass it on to someone vulnerable!
Are they not just piling on more pressure after Christmas with this rescheduling? Surely there’s procedures already booked in for those times in the new year.
More of the same.
National embarrassment
Nothing to do with all the consultants being off for 2 weeks No?
@PDiddy: How do you know consultants are off for two weeks? Can you name your sources? Oh I see, you are just talking through your backside.
If this was Ryanair we’d be kicking up a stink . Keep the recovery going , playground for the globalists
@Ken Hayden: What do you expect the hospitals to do in the current situation? Hospitals simply don’t have the resources, staff are taking measures that they know will help them get through such a busy period with minimum impact on patient survival.
Kick up a stink at the state and the fact that CUH were even put in this position, not at CUH itself.
@Veronica: (A) what is the current situation (B) have we not had Christmas season before .
Why can a hospital not foresee these problems , where do we live .
@Veronica: I’m not blaming the staff , I’m sure they do their best .
I am blaming the overlords , the admin , who control the money .
@Veronica: do we even have 1 hospital in the actual country ‘with the resources’ ? even 1 – it’s a lame excuse every single time from government who take our taxes but fail to use them appropriately
Ah, ye old revelry. Prefer Tomfoolery myself.
Ireland is a Third WWold country.
Ireland is a failed state.
Young people need to be told that there is no future for them here.
Foreign direct investment into the failed state of Ireland is very foolish.
@Colin Morris: 1.4 million medical cards and half a million GP cards. That’s a lot of people not contributing.
@lavbeer: that’s a very sweeping statement….. I have a medical card as I have an autoimmune disease, I still work full time and pay my taxes and ‘contribute’ as you put it.
Irish hospital caught unawares by flu outbreak in Winter flu season.
This so-called ‘Aussie flu’ really sucks and especially as it seems to hang in there. Can understand that people with breathing problems will feel it more as it is really effin awful from the lungs up to the throat so good idea to shift patient emphasis for a while.
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