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MY HUSBAND DIED over eleven years ago, and since then it has been me and my daughter. She is 25 years old and in October she is emigrating.
She is a highly educated young woman having completed a BA in English and Politics in UCC and going on to complete a Masters in Journalism in DCU.
However upon graduating, due to her not being able to find employment, she was forced to take a job in a call centre. Not that she was ungrateful for the job, she was lucky to have one at least, but it did not pay well and it was not what I had paid out all that money for. I invested in her future in the hope that she would be able to stay here .
However, her and four of her friends are being forced to leave. Her friends are also highly educated – social workers, programme developers and graphic designers.
What was really disheartening for me – as her mother – was to watch her do a job that she had no passion for. It really did kill me to see her slog away in a job that she could have gotten without any college courses.
She is the only thing I have left and I am utterly heartbroken that she has to leave this country. This month I will wave goodbye to her at the airport and I don’t know when I will see her again – that is what really upsets me. My heart wants her to stay but my head wants her to go – she has her own life to lead and she can’t stay here for her mammy.
The only other emotion I feel apart from heartache is anger – anger that the government don’t seem to live in reality and understand the gravity of the situation.
My blood boiled when I heard Minister Noonan’s words stating that it is a “lifestyle choice” that children are leaving the country. He has some nerve speaking to the children who would love nothing more than to stay here in the country they were born and raised in. And he has some nerve speaking to the many parents who have to wave their children off at the departure gates. Does he really think that these students want to leave their home not knowing when or if they will ever return again.
Those flippant remarks he made were degrading to parents across Ireland. They were hurtful remarks with no thought about what families are going through and the tough decisions people are making on a daily basis. We are educating our young and paying a high price to do so, to ensure they are the best in the world and then we are shipping them off. They are our best assets and we are exporting them. These are the people that will make this country what it is meant to be again.
It is all getting very real for me. My daughter handed in her notice, she is getting her travel injections done so it will not be long now until she is gone. I haven’t really said, in such an emotional way, about how I feel about her leaving. It is the right thing for her to do and it is not right for me to weigh in on her decision with such emotions, but it won’t be easy.
She will be away for Christmas and possibly the one after. She is also missing a significant birthday here so it will be tough. I am not the only one that must be feeling like this, I know I am not. There are thousands of parents across Ireland that are in the exact same boat as me. My daughter is lucky in one way that she does not have any ties here that would prevent her from leaving and finding work – that is one positive thing.
I am very close to my daughter and although she is a grown woman it doesn’t stop me from worrying about her far away in a foreign country – every parent feels like that I am sure, no matter what age their children are, you still think of them as your babies.
People may think that it is silly to say that I am not sure when I will see her again – but I am not. She has saved nearly two years for the money for her ticket to Australia. It is not just an hour flight away. I myself am an educated woman. I have a HDip, but I too cannot find work. The most humiliating thing I have ever had to do is sign onto the dole. I am also in negative equity and I could lose my house next year – I am struggling. Unless I get a very good job, there really isn’t a hope that I will get to visit her.
The question that angers me and I am constantly asking is – why does she have to leave her country? It is a simple question but one that angers me so much. She could give back so much to this country as could many many other young educated people but they are being forced to leave – the important word for the government to remember is that they are being forced. Simple as that. This is not a holiday for them, these people are leaving their families, friends, their whole lives – and it is not out of choice.
My daughter says she will miss me – but I know that it is for the best that she goes. I want to see her find her passion again and do something that makes her happy, that is what all our young people deserve, to work at something they have trained long and hard for.
I don’t think that our politicians have a clue what the average Joe Soap is going through. They are cutting the most vulnerable, the disabled, the mental health budget, the unemployed and they are keeping the higher paid people in a job.
Where is the fairness. I have to send my daughter away so that she has a future, how is that just.
Mary McCarthy lives in Cork.
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Long time at both troughs …
Better offer incoming no doubt
@: same as Jarry
Good riddance. She’s a lot to answer for the way she treated Sergeant Mc
cabe.
No loss at all.
Perhaps the most nothing minister to ever exist
@Niall Horan Appreciation Club: Eoghan Murphy surley
Any hope the Daly and Wallace would join her? Those two yokes are a national embarrassment.
@: Clare Daly and Mick Wallace are two voices of reaon in the trough of the European ‘Parliament’. Just watch them in action on YouTube and read the comments from around Europe where people are praising Ireland for its courageous stand.
@Fearg: Any comments I’ve read from around Europe have not been complimentary
@Fearg: certainly in the aftermath of the Israeli bombardment and murder of innocent Gaza citizens they might be the only two voices of reason in the EU.
@Fearg: what’s Daley and Wallace’s comment on the little Irish girl Emily Hand who’s still missing since Oct 7th……. Nothing but silence. Shame on them.
@Fearg: I wasn’t a fan of Daly and Wallace but I have changed my mind recently.
Are people having a laugh. Daly and Wallace are two absolute fools. Two Russian apologists. They make a complete show of Ireland in europe. If the Irish people vote them back in they deserve everything they get.
@Fearg: Two communists.
@tommy bailey: nothing communist about either of them.
@tommy bailey: I’d take that as a compliment in this day and age …
Fascist running wild in England and Eastern Europe
At least they work for their money, and are well liked by Europe for their stance on real issues. Can’t be said for Francis fitz
Regardless of her achievements, when I see her political colours the words “writing” and “wall” spring to mind… can’t figure out why exactly
Considering she is 73 this is hardly a surprise.
I wish her well in her future endeavours, a brilliant representative of the Irish people
@Reece Dooley: You’re gas
@Reece Dooley: how many pensions does she have
@Reece Dooley: A waste of space.
@Reece Dooley: Maurice McCabe would highly disagree. She is a nasty piece of work.
@brian madden: one short of Jarry Adams
@Reece Dooley: I was asked: “which one is she?” and I couldn’t think of anything. Now that’s some legacy.
@brian madden: about the same amount as laptops and phones “lost”
@brian madden:
Irish TDs (and MEPs) now can only claim one public pension, whichever one is the highest, which is inline with all public servants.
The law was changed in 2011 by the FG lab government Francis Fitzgerald was a member of.
@Liam23: how many is that?
@brian madden: Jarry would have 3 pensions
I’m devastated. I just can’t go on after hearing this.
@reg morrisey: it’s all down hill from here oh wait been going that way for last ten years with housing.
The writing is on the wall for Fianna Failure , Fine Grabbers and the Greedy Greens……
I’m not a supporter of any political party but if they don’t accept the results of the 2020 General Election then we we’re hitting turbulence with the current shower…
I am devastated, crying a river here and we are doomed.
Any chance Frances might be setting the stage to take a run at a final payday in the next general election, having served her time in the wilderness of the EU after her resignation in 2017?
@Dvsespaña:
The Aras?
@P.J. Nolan: She might chance it
@Jp Cleary:
Reckon it’s between her and Mariead McGuinness for the FG nomination.
That said, I highly doubt either would be moving to the park.
@P.J. Nolan: That thought occurred to me too. She won’t be getting my vote.
Is she any relation to Dee Forbes!?
Thank god, she done nothing for clondalkin
Very, very very damaged goods who was certainly strongly involved in smearing Maurice McCabe, John Wilson. Shame on Dublin for giving her this seat
A useless waste of space – a waffler
@Johnny:
You just discribed every politician on the planet
A disgrace to her country.
Seanad here she comes
Why would she refuse to run for the European Parliament, where the salary and perks are multiples of the Seanad?
Now if she had run and lost, that would be different, although the Seanad is more for disappointed Dail candidates.
Whatever its state, thank you for Tusla and for beingt he Minister responsible for the Marriage Equality referendum, for your work as Chair of the Council for the Status of Women (National Women’s Council) and the Women’s Political Association. That said, it was her actions (or inactions!) in justice, the whistleblower that came, went and returned to haunt her!
@Tom Dillon: Tusla is not fit for purpose and is responsible for daily misery on a level somewhat comparable to what me and others I’ve known have gone through, suffering in -certain- public services of this statelet
Got her big fat pension from Europe, job done
Frances is definitely going to run for next President. That’s what this is about.
She’s not running again as an MEP because she wants to run in the GE in 2025. Can read her like a book.
@Ian:
No chance
She going to make a run for the general election.
It’s going to get dirty in Dublin
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