Sign in. It’s quick, free and it’s up to you.
An account is an optional way to support the work we do. Find out more.
When Mary McCarthy began to write about a character in her book who was diagnosed with terminal cancer, she never imagined a few years later she would find herself in the same circumstances. She writes:
I STARTED MY book, After the Rain, eight years ago. It was a story about a woman with terminal cancer and how she and her family had to learn to deal with it. This March I was diagnosed with it myself.
So is this a case of life imitating art or what? My story is very different from my heroine, Emer’s experience, although the prognosis is the same.
For all of 2011 I suffered acute pain with a trapped sciatic nerve. Excruciating. I tried all the usual remedies including physio, acupuncture, heat wraps and I was stooped over as that helped to release the nerve. I went as far as buying a walker so I could walk the dog in the park — I moved quickly and resembled Quasimodo on speed. Eventually I agreed to back surgery which was due to happen in January. Two weeks before the operation the pain disappeared and I was walking perfectly. A miracle. The surgery was cancelled and in March at a follow-up visit with the surgeon, he suggested I should take up Pilates to strengthen my core muscles. Grand idea, until I got a nagging pain in my right rib and I became a bit breathless so I went for a chest X-ray.
The results came in – lung full of fluid – so I had a bag for for five days’ draining which I referred to as my Louis Vuitton bag. My case was serious – the fluid contained secondary cancer cells.
That’s it, I said to my oncologist and he wondered how I knew. My brother, Niall, had died eleven years previously and another brother, Declan, had died from lung cancer two years before.
I asked him how long I had. He knew I wanted to hear the truth and told me I had 18 to 24 months, maybe longer.“At least I won’t get Alzheimers,” I concluded cheerfully. I think he thought I was a nutcase due to my calm reaction to the news that I was going to die. When the doctors said I would experience a range of emotions, I said I knew already, as I’d written all about it. I told the doctor about my novel and he was astounded.
They then had to find my primary cancer. After loads of tests, nothing was found. Cancer with no tumour – but apparently this happens to one in 20 people. So much for being healthy I thought. I’d quit smoking, I had just got my gold card from Weight Watchers and had given up the booze for Lent. I’m undergoing chemotherapy which is not for the faint-hearted. I have bad days and good days.
My friends are remarkable. I cannot put into words the support I am getting from them and my family. My son Dara is devastated. He lives in Rome, but is coming back to live with me. I told him my only regret was not having a grandchild to which he responded: “I didn’t know there was a rush on.” Neither did I!
I’m not actually dying at the moment, but I will die from this. How do I feel about dying? I suppose I’ll be scared at the time but I’ll probably be so sick by then I won’t care. I’ll insist on as much morphine as possible —I’m such a wimp the dentist has to sedate me! While I don’t believe in an afterlife, I’m keeping my options open, just in case. If there is another world I’d love to meet my idol, George Harrison.
My worries are any mother’s worries. Will my son be okay? Will he be able to live in our lovely home when I’m gone? The gas bill is astronomical! My dog Bennie will miss me like hell because he is my shadow. I take every day as it comes. I want no pity, sympathy or platitudes.
I have had a nice life. I loved my teaching job for 34 years and took early retirement five years ago. I truly loved writing my books. I have seen the places I wanted to see and I have extraordinary people around me. I’ve managed to retain my sense of humour, thankfully. There really is a funny side to everything. To my delight, I have my fifth book published. Things could be a lot worse! Or as Emer in the novel says: things always seem better after the rain.
After the Rain is published by Poolbeg and is out now priced at €9.99
To embed this post, copy the code below on your site
Willie O Dea caught telling lies. Shocker!!
Suppose one can’t really blame Willie for fibbing, the majority will remember and believe his soundbites, would be better however if the other branch of the coalition FF did not lie about its coalition partners FG however, thanks to the Journal for this article and the others debunking other lies e.g. re the 8th campaign etc.
Willie as useful a tits on bull unless you need a favour from the council when is is the man . The personification of parish pumpery
@Sean: The statistics tell their own story and there is no harm in Willie admitting that poverty is the evil in our society which needs to be tackled urgently, not just because it is Christmas. Governments must try harder to help the poorest in society and raise the living standards of people struggling to look after themselves and their families.
I saw a map recently of all the empty and derelict properties around Dublin, it is absolutely shocking that the authorities don’t do something about it..
You’d swear Willie and FF had no hand, act or part in bringing about this poverty he’s so appalled about.
@Sean: ff policy caused child poverty
Still the statistics shown here are not something we should as a nation be proud of
Willie O’Dea is a joke. Nothing he says can be taken seriously.
@Reg: Ye between him and phil hogan I cant tell which is the biggest liar.
WTF? I thought Willie O’ Dea was a character from Republic of Telly. Is he a real person?
Has his memory of the malaria drug returned?..the one he lied about on VB..
Fianna Fáil and facts?!
I wonder does he even know what countries are in the OECD or is he just hoping the rest of us don’t ? I mean we mightn’t be the top of the list but for feck sake, even a cursory glance of a list of countries that includes Mexico and Turkey should tell him to cop on a bit.
What he’s not telling you is that his salary is one of the highest paid to a Government representative in his position in the OECD and his pension will far exceed what is accepted as the norm.
Willie might be so used to feeding unverifiable facts to the voters that he forgot they might not realise that everybody knows Irish children are not in the same poverty league as those from Turkey, Chile, Estonia, Greece…I thought the biggest threat to our children was childhood obesity!
No, Winston, it’s still the clergy!
How does this gombeen get an interview by any serious media outlet .
He is well known to confuse lies with truth and had to resign his ministry many years ago for the same thing .
He should know, his heart leader and failure party created this.
Never mind when he was caught telling taxi drivers conference one thing (unbeknown to o dea, he was being recorded) whilst publicly backing his party in a contrary stance. The man is the epitome of all that is wrong in irish politics. And yet FF top the polls with a two faced sleeven as its leader. :(
The children starve while politicians and economists bicker over statistics.
And that @Alex Falcone is it in a nutshell!
Kids going to school without a proper meal can’t eat statistics.
mighty mouse in Limerick, church mouse in dáil!
Willie Willie Willie can’t you see
Sometimes your tashe just hypnotize me
And I just love your wafflin’ ways
Guess that’s why they broke, and you’re so paid
I’m not sure the the child victims of extreme poverty obsesses about degrees of poverty. They endure misery and deprivation, stunted lives, restricted opportunities, lack of security and stability.
@Micheal OLainn:
Don’t know why that’s being red thumbed.
@Micheal OLainn: The point is not to debate child poverty – but rather to fact check statements made by politicians. As long as stays neutral and relies on factual stats it does a good job.
Have to agree with Michael’s point there. While it is a factcheck story, and O’Dea’s claims are statistically false and political spoofing, the real issue is how real children are experiencing real poverty.
Can’t say I know how to properly read statistics and I don’t know if there are better models to use, but, am I wrong in thinking that using an internal median poverty line restricts it to internal comparative poverty. Therefore if a country becomes poorer over time, the number of children can become poorer without any change in that index.
Also, in comparing national indices, there is the missing like for like element. How do we compare within the original eight countries in the first measurement? Being midway up in a group of Western European nations is not the same as being midway up in a group that includes Eastern European or developing nations.
I’d guess that our kids in poverty are not the worst off in our group, but that’s only a guess, I’m not sure if if the OECD have a much more accurate reading.
In saying that, the above charts measure income. It doesn’t fully measure support from state or family, it doesn’t measure how much of that income is wasted by some parents in the pub, bookie office, dealer’s corner or clothes shops. Where there’s good parents, kids are usually well provided for.
Don’t have children unless you can afford them.
@Patrick Gough: you’re right .. it’s as simple as that in your world ….
Lots of people had kids when they could afford them… thing is that after the government Willie was involved in fuсked up the country’s economy those “lots of people” were left with a bit of a problem… they could no longer afford the kids and having grown kinda attached couldn’t exactly hand them back to the hospital either…What we have here with Willie is someone who fuсked up on a spectacular level trying to dictate how to clean up the mess… unfortunately due to a section of the Irish population having the intelligence levels of amebae and the memories of goldfish he’s actually in a position to do so instead of sharing a landing in Mountjoy with the rest of that government.
@Poole Hyde: how did you get pass the curse filter ? .. very well said and spot on !
Suzie, just switch the keyboard on your phone/computer to a different language like French or Russian. Different code for the same letters is sent but the same letters show up.Most phones have a hotkey to the left of the spacebar so you can change quickly between English and whatever…
Cheers . I must remember that one !
I agree with the kids comment above and how the cost of having kids could be absorbed initially however when things changed that cost couldn’t be managed. Fair.
People on social welfare who can’t support themselves bringing children that they can’t support into the world is the absolute pits though and that is different to the scenario above.
I thought politicians could only Lie in State once they had died!
Child poverty is caused by the parents, not the govt.
100%
In Ireland for a long time there is subsidised education (not free I know but seismically smaller than other countries in terms of cost) and if you’ve a work ethic and work hard you can get jobs and move up.
The above has been there for past 20 years regardless of what government has been in power.
Are ye seriously checking the statements of ‘Willie The Perjurer’ O’Dea? He was on RTÉ during the week being asked whether he believed Gerry Adams or not, Willie, the man who perjured himself talking about a member of Sinn Féin and who had to apologise and retract. It’s almost surreal, the behaviour of this Marks Bros. refugee!
That man can’t lay straight in the bed !
@Lar Moran: *lie
Blah de dea da da da blah de dea da da
Either way, there’s still thousands of children in this country who went to bed hungry tonight. Disgraceful in any country, by anyone’s standards.
@Grainne O’Kelly:
Grainne there is no need for any child in this country to go anywhere hungry. We have all the supports available that they need to watered, fed and clothed. Parents are not prioritizing their children’s needs! They are more interested in the boozer, drugs, smartphones, widescreen TVs and branded fashion wear. I see them every day and generally it is pure neglect by the parents!
Grainne .. if there is then it’s the parents fault i.e. bad parenting. .there’s plenty of support out there if needed .
Suzie – 100% agreed. The amount of money given towards social care for this is staggering. If you have a situation where you’re hungry or can’t put a roof over your head and you want to get it sorted there is real support there for you.
Children are supposed to be poor. They aren’t allowed work any more and so are left dependent on hand outs (from their parents).
But seriously, I find the topic of child poverty to be a bit loaded and pointed. Most of this is the fault of bad family situations, rotten luck and let’s be honest, bad parents.
I really liked Willie O’Dea’s song with the rubberbandi. He seems very funny and quite sound I would be very surprised if he lied
A spoofer in the dail. Well I never.
Are you for real, he had to pay Maurice Quinlivan compensation for the lies he was spreading around Limerick about him. Whiskers has plenty of previous when it comes to telling fibs!
@PaulJ: Why not lie, it’ll get you elected and ask Trump.
I have no time for the OECD…
http://www.rte.ie/news/business/2015/0915/727909-oecd-report-on-ireland/
“The OECD said the Government should broaden the tax base and protect revenues by shifting the burden of taxation away from work and onto immovable assets, such as property.
Ireland’s property tax is low by international standards, and the OECD urged the Government to increase the amount of money raised from property tax in order to reduce income tax.”
please do a fact check on the sugarman claims. lies by ff aint nothing new.
The stats don’t lie
Is willie a real man or one of the thunderbirds how can anyone take him seriously lol
This politician is correct in what he says. The sooner Ireland becomes a majority Muslim country the better. Giving to charity is one of the central tenets of Islam. Allahu Ackbar
@mohammad ibn abubakr: Not going to happen .. ya stirrer …
The fact that child poverty exists whilst billions over out of the country to service rich bankers debt is ultimately a shame on the Irish government . FACT..
If Willie ever decides to do acting he’d make a great Hitler with that moustache. It’s a mad looking yoke!
Not surprised that Willie o Dea was caught out in a lie plus if it were true the only one that could have caused it were FF
The above comments in a nutshell…
“Haha..! Willy O’Dea said child poverty was rife in Ireland and he’s been proved wrong, it isn’t rife…!!
That’s so funny, but seriously folks, let’s talk about all the little children that are living in poverty in Ireland….”
And once again, the comments section of the Journal.ie eats itself.
Why don’t ye do a fact check on salary’s of politicians in this dump compared to the EU Average and bring in expenses.
I’ll wait for the results
Thanks
have your say